On Being Creative

I'm not sure if it's the weather or just my mood lately, but I have this major desire to be creative. I used to say I didn't have an artistic bone in my body because I thought creativity was something only expressed through drawings and paintings. As I've gotten older and tried some different art classes for myself, however, my definition of creativity has changed. To me, being creative just means expressing yourself in a way that appeals to any of the five senses. Whether you cook, write, sing, play an instrument, draw, have an eye for fashion, or take really cool pictures, you're being creative.

As my definition of creativity has changed, my creative outlets have grown more and more numerous. I went through a period of time where I was just so burned out with life. School was overwhelming, social drama was exhausting, and I was running on empty. My artistic desire drained slowly out of me until it practically disappeared. Whenever I had free time, I sat around bored, wondering what to do. Nothing appealed to me.

I don't know what it is about senior year, but it has been the best year. Academically, socially, creatively, every way you can imagine. Hands down my favorite year in high school; I would even venture to say one of my all time favorite years of school period. It's that good. One of the reasons it's so good is because creativity is seeping its way back into my bones. Art is meandering its way back into my veins. I come home wanting to play the piano or sing along to my guitar. I'm doodling things in class that I'm actually proud of and save just in case. I'm finding sculptures from the pottery class I took junior year, and I remember putting my heart into them and how proud of them I felt, so I keep looking into community art classes. I read any spare moment I get. I'm writing again (I was a huge writer in elementary and middle school. I wrote stories for fun and was always one of the first to share my poems in class. Then came high school and a sudden loss of courage. So writing again is kind of a big deal for me). I want to learn to sew/refashion/upcycle and I want to teach myself videography. I'm working on my photography. I'm writing a blog for crying out loud! Any creative outlet I've considered in my 17 years of life is coming back and knocking on my door, shouting that they want to be let in and appreciated.

I wish there were more than 24 hours a day so I could devote more time to all of these artistic pursuits I want to dive into. I wish I had endless resources to experiment with. I wish that I could somehow develop all of these into talents and find some way to use them for good. I want to be creative with my life. I want to do something with my hands and my mind that is useful and beautiful.

I used to get upset when people talked about their passions because I didn't think I had any. There was no one thing I loved above everything else. I've realized that contrary to my previous beliefs, I am very passionate. I am extremely passionate about many different things. And I think that is one of the reasons I think life is so wonderful- I love many things with a passion. And having this love for so much makes life so much more enjoyable, don't you think?

Sincerely, mad